duminică, 24 septembrie 2017

Planset dintr-o groapa ...





 Planset dintr-o groapa ...

Lumina pluteşte doar la suprafaţă
Pleoapa dinăuntru nu vrea să respire,
Pe perna dimineţii, degete obosite
Resfiră pletele iubitei mele fine

Ce s-a întâmplat? Un troc? O prevestire ?
Pustiul a rodit sau s-a purtat război?
Ce s-a-ntâmplat in spatele acestor largi ferestre?
Patimă roasă de acidul dintre noi

Vezi prunci cerşind la vreme de război,
Trecând desculţi prin colb, la suflet goi,
Ducând cu ei poveri şi suferinţi,
Copii ai nimănui, copii cuminţi...

Vezi scrijelit cu schije un mormânt
Şi numele celor ce nu mai sunt...
Furtuni şi ploi vor plânge zi de zi,
Ei sincer şi cuminte vor muri

Sunt kilometri de dor până la tine,
Atâţia oameni sunt acum între noi,
Atâtea dealuri şi atâtea ape,
De dor sunt scrise atâtea foi.

Pe aceste foi, lăuntricul război,
Nerăspunzând pe sine se întreabă,
Iar eu de atâtea ore aşteptând
Mă descompun şi azi într-o silabă

Acest război ne va purta-n izbândă?
Eu lupt cu foc, cu aer şi cu apă,
Când toate-acestea, dragoste, îţi scapă,
Si într-un colţ te-aşezi de-a dreptul blândă.

Sunt ca şi mort, căci ochiul tău mă sapă,
Lăsând în mine rodul din osândă,
Şi vreau, apoi, tot pleoapa ta plângândă
Să-mi dea puterea să nu cad în groapă.

Sunt obosit ca moartea pe vreme de război,
Şi-aş vrea să fie pace măcar o săptămână,
Să ne-ntâlnim pe câmpul de luptă dintre noi,
Cu zâmbetul pe buze si sufletul arvună,
Tu să-mi întinzi o puşcă, eu să-ţi întind o mână...

The deep...





        


          When I was an employee eight years ago in a sales department I had a lot of free time on my hands to just mess around the office and navigate the web all day, possibly because the company was doing so poorly and it wasn't quite selling anything. I spent my days in a lone office with few people around ,me ,the computer ...and a pack full of cigarettes to keep me through the day .
          The usual media tabloids,porn and funny videos were my dayjob and the commenting sections were always full of trivial and unimportant bullshit just like it is today , though something caught my eye when I stumbled across a link ...it had a description saying "facilis descensus averno - want a journey? " . Because I was so bored, I clicked it hoping actually to infest my computer with some virus ,quit office early and let the IT guys to solve it . Well...it wasn't really something special about it , just an animated character from some 90's anime singing cheerfully a child song, the background was filled with "happy clouds" and smiling birds , i clicked on the picture hoping some shit will download but really nothing happend. I was dissapointed at this time so I went to the smoking area to light up my cigarette.
          When I got back ,the song came to an end and numbers appeard in a box toghether with the voice of a woman saying : 1 for sorrow,2 for joy,3 for a girl,4 for a boy,5 for silver,6 for gold,7 for a secret,never to be told ... I recognized it , it was an old nursery song . After that the woman's voice stopped and another link appeared on the site , I clicked it impatiently and my computer just froze ,I began to swear at my RAM memory and rebooted . When I tried to look at my browser history I couldn't find the site I was surfing anymore but among my emails was a strange one saying "Are we going?" toghether with an attachment from one 30192vlr2@sigaintrzvw.onion . I never gave it much tought and marked it as spam ,it's still in my inbox today and just recently opened the attachment . It was two days ago before I started writing this post and strange things started happening around my house .
          
I live in Portland, Oregon close to the river and I can swear that ,on every night I have this feeling someone is watching me from beside the window,I receive strange phonecalls with nothing but static , some people contacting me through messenger saying wierd stuff like "you can sit with us but never dine toghether" or some phrase in latin saying "nec pluribus impar",they are all fake accounts and I think it might be the same guy or mabey a group of people...oh God I wish they leave me alone !! . Last night I found a rock at my doorstep ,dripping a red substance from it ..I didn't touch it , I hardly want to know if that thing was blood or not . I swear if this goes on I am contacting the police ,this farse has gone too far ! I'm posting this here is the hope that someone will help me out and tell me the heck' is going on. I think it all started with the picture in the attachment as I shortly began having panic attacks and feeling really anxious so I deleted it... I... I think I found it again ...and something tells me subconsciously to share it with you ... It's....It's the picture right here












Alone with sleep




      


        PLease Help mE !! For some time now I suspect something is wrong with my father . He was always so cheerfull and happy , he used to come into my room and chat all the time , now he just sits in a corner and watches me as if he doesn't trust me with something, he gives me this long stares and doesn't want to speak with me . I tryed to ask him : Dad, are you mad at me? Dad,why do keep staring at me ? He always remains silent and it's really frustrating when he does that.
        Yesterday I came back from school, he usually asked me if I had a good day but he was just sitting there just when i left home ,staring at my door , I hope he doesn't go into my stuff... i mean, I have porn and so on like any other normal kid but other than that there isn't much to find, people ussualy find me boring and plain looking. Tonight when I woke up to get some water I found him again, staring at me with the creepy look in his eyes . He's really wierd lately ,I really don't know what to do , please help ! I'm begining to suspect he knows that I'm the one that killed him....